Monday, August 22, 2011

Bad Teacher


The problem with "Bad Teacher" is that it makes it very easy for you to write it off as "Bad Teacher, Bad movie". Unfortunately it is true.
What is the movie about?
Elizabeth Halsey- A teacher who is "bad"- and if you thought she is bad in a provocative, arousing way, you are only partially right. She is bad that way, but the bad here refers to her being really bad at teaching and being even worse as a person.(Besides, I don't see how one can look completely hot with those pot-lips and awful skin which makes her look like 50+. SO she is bad at being hot as well!)
She does not teach, smokes pot in school, shows movies to her students while she sleeps over hangovers, cheats in school exams and takes advantage of every opportunity to embezzle. And you think, maybe she needs the money badly, maybe for something we would want to forgive her for. She needs the money badly, yes, for a ........ boob job. That alone should make you go like WTF. She does ALL of this for a boob job, without which she looks hot anyway?
But what's even more WTF is why she needs the boob job in the first place- Because she believes that the rich men don't go for her because she doesn't have big enough boobs. I feel like punning and saying you can't get as booby as that. But seriously, if she really had bigger boobs and I were the rich (boring) guy, I would definitely have thought of her as the epitome of a money-chasing hot girl and kept her for the one-night stands.
Anyway back to the story (or what little there is of it), there is also a part about another teacher Amy Squirrel- a teacher who intends well, but is a weirdo and in the end turns spiteful. But if the directors wanted me to hate Amy, it was almost impossible. Though she was acting bonkers (talking to the principal in the men's washroom, for eg) I was myself feeling the irritation she had towards Cameron, so her antics were neither irritating nor funny. And in the end, when she got arrested, I was wondering- Are we trying to say people who are not hot have no right to exist?? Wow!
What is that bad about the movie?
Flimsy thin plot- so flimsy they could have made Cameron a negligee out of it. And remember I am talking after seeing so many Tamil movies and Hindi movies (which should speak for themselves)- so you should know how really bad the plot was.
Worst possible protagonist- I don't know what the directors were thinking-  that anyone would sympathize with a bitch (who deserves that tag and) who needs boobs?  Or did they think that her hotness will make up for her lacking any sort of reasoning?
Pathetic Comedy. You go there expecting some good saucy cheesy jokes you can remember and laugh about. I can remember one and only one comedy in the entire movie. Not a single dialogue, not a single moment when I can forget myself and LMAO. None at all. (The scene I remember is when Justin TimberLake and Cameron do "it" with jeans on! The way he behaves as if he has done the hottest thing and she is just waiting to run away from the room)
Is there anything at all good about the movie?
Yes. Cameron has acted well. So has the gym teacher guy (nice smile!). Of course, Cameron has so converted into the bad teacher that you don't feel for her. But that's the script writer's fault, not hers.
And a little dialogue in the end- where Cameron says "Forget it boy. A hot girl will never never think of dating you. She might date someone who is an idiot, who is not half as talented as you are, just because he is popular, but she will never even look at you." I wish someone told that to guys who look like dumbasses and expect to date Aishwarya Rai. Look for someone who is similar to you man. And for god's sake if that hot girl doesn't have enough brains to dust your feet, do you really want to bother?
(I also understood how women like Elizabeth get away with what they do, but let me keep the philosopihizing to myself!)
Should I watch this movie?
If you want to see a hot girl and 2 minutes of topless women (mainly boobs) on magazines, you might want to. But then again, you might want to just download some better adult comedy and be done with it. 
And ya, I said download. Don't even think of paying for the movie. You might as well burn your cash instead.

Summary:
Movie: Bad Teacher
Director: Jake Casden
Cast: Cameron Diaz, Justin Timberlake, Jason Segel, Lucy Punch
Genre: Romantic Comedy/Adult Humour
IMDB Rating: 5.9/10 ( I am wondering what anyone saw in it to give 5.9!!)
Masala Popcorn Rating:3.5/10

Gone with the Wind....

I am happy that I should start off this blog with “Gone with the Wind”. What, you ask me, isn’t that a terribly old movie? Yes it is. But it is also an awfully beautiful movie and I saw it only today (though I had read the book long ago and simply loved it) so I thought why not start with this one.. (Don’t worry, a review of a very new movie follows this one)
Anyway back to Gone with the wind.

What is the movie about?
It is the story of one woman, or I might say 2 women in the Southern states during the American Civil War. One woman has all the classical attributes of a “lady” (it is a vanishing term, I know) and the other is what you would call today a “bitch”. However, the lines are not drawn that clearly, and though she sells herself to 2 men she never could like, Scarlett O Hara, the selfish, cunning, charming woman also takes control of her family, works her ass off to get them on their feet and is quite charmingly, very stupidly, madly in love with a man- a man she dreams of and sacrifices so much for, but a man who doesn’t know her or like her for what she is, who likes her for her body. In the same way, the otherwise stupid sentimental useless Melanie shows her courage and strength at different points in the story, making herself as hatefully endearing as Scarlett to the spectator.
The parallel line to these women is drawn by the characters of Ashley, a man of the intellect, not suited for practical matters, and utterly incapable otherwise, in love with a woman with a similar temperament, but unable to control the passion evoked in him by Scarlett; and , of course, Rhett Butler. The man with no morals. The man who is only worse than Scarlett in being selfish and cruel. But the man who respects Melanie’s greatness. The man who madly loves Scarlett. From the first word he spoke in the movie till the last “I don’t give a damn” he just bowls you over. If you like Scarlett for being the strong woman she is, you love Rhett Butler in spite of what he is.

What is good about the movie?
Characters. In creating such wonderfully contradictory characters Margaret Mitchell as well as the movie director (who made the movie as good as the book) have etched in our hearts people whom we can never forget.
Dialogues. I am not going to start about the dialogues- I am sure you have heard enough about them.
Theme. So the only other thing I want to mention is that the background of the Civil War is also intriguing. One, it makes you think about war and peace again. Two it makes you rethink about what you learnt in school about Abe Lincoln and did he go wrong somewhere. And more importantly, it asks the question what relevance do gallantry and ideals and honor have in human life? Do they mean anything at all in the long run? The movie tries to answer that they do, but I really don’t know. What would your answer be?

So should i watch it?
Definitely. It is a wonderful movie to watch and I strongly recommend you to see it.

That’s it for today, and the next review is coming soon.. But you’ll have to wait, for tomorrow’s another day!


Summary:
Movie:  Gone with the wind
Director: Victor Fleming 
Cast: Vivien Leigh, Clark Gable, Leslie Howard, Olivia De Havilland
IMDB Rating: 8.2/10 
Masala Popcorn Rating: 8/10